Marriage counseling is an essential tool to improve any marital relationship. Read on to learn more about common marital difficulties, the barriers to marriage counseling, the first steps to getting started, and to learn about six key benefits to marriage counseling.
Marriage is difficult. There is no certificate or degree given to ensure that we are a competent and loving partner. In many cases, we try our best in terms of what we've seen modeled by our parents. Sometimes this is not a helpful guideline. Like anything else, success in marriage takes work, commitment, and action steps. In many areas of life, we have no problem seeking experts for help when we need them; we call dentists, medical doctors, physical therapists, mechanics, plumbers, fitness instructors, business coaches, and tutors for our children. However, in the most important relationship in our lives, which also has a crucial impact on our children, we often try to succeed in a vacuum without any external counsel, support, or input on the most challenging areas.
Many married people feel their marriage is either adequate, very challenging, barely survivable, or completely lost, but yet they will not take the first step to improve it by contacting a marriage counselor. This is because many couples view counseling as a sign of weakness or defeat. They often continue to play out the same dysfunctional dynamics and arguments for years without changing the rudder in their marriage to move in new directions. Whatever the barrier, not seeking marriage counseling to enhance your relationship and deal with significant problems, is akin to never taking your car in for an oil change. Like the car, the marriage will eventually falter and potentially break down or plod along for years without either partner being truly satisfied. Divorce is an option, and there may be moments when it seems appealing. However, it is an expensive, grueling, and disruptive process to your life, finances, children, and family. At the least, it makes sense to give marriage counseling a try before coming to any conclusions.
Working with a competent marriage counselor could substantially impact both the success and vibrancy of your marriage relationship. When compared with divorce and the multitude of expenses, pain, and impacts upon children, the potential fees and time investment in marriage counseling is minimal. The first step is to identify the need to improve. Secondly, you would need to reach out to a trained counseling or psychology clinic to find out about options. Many clinics provide free consultations to assist with choosing the right therapist, setting goals, and coordinating schedules.
It can equip you with communication skills, including active listening, which can help you to listen to one another and understand one another more clearly.
It will equip you with tools to hear one another's perspectives in conflictual situations and come to mutually beneficial decisions.
Managing boundaries (the lines that separate you, your thoughts, and your feelings from another person) is a crucial part of a healthy life and relationships.
It is surprising to many people how these early developmental relationships powerfully influence how we relate to our spouses in the present.
It will equip you to understand better, express your view, and learn the ability to hear your partner's perspective without being defensive.
It will give you the ability to solidify new healthy patterns of daily life together, resulting in a sense of trust and long-term mutual satisfaction for each of you.
Like anything in life, marriage requires a set of attitudes and skills to be a success. A marriage counselor or psychologist can teach you these skills while monitoring your progress, assisting in mediating challenging conflicts, and giving objective feedback to assist you in growing together.
If you procrastinate regarding marriage counseling, things can reach a point where it feels tough to make gains and correct long-term conflictual patterns. However, it's important to have hope. It is a myth that marriage has to dull over the years and become a state of being merely a roommate or a co-parent. It is never too late to take steps today to grow your marriage toward the type of relationship that you desire to have tomorrow.
Please review the options below and contact us for a free consultation to assess the best approach for your needs.
We offer traditional couples therapy where one therapist meets with the couple to help you assess the relationship, the relationship strengths, and areas that need attention for the purpose of strengthening the relationship.
We offer discernment counseling for couples who want to assess whether or not their relationship continues to be viable for both partners. We can help with amicably discussing and exploring the sustainability of your relationship.
We offer consultation and counsel to separated or divorced parents who are seeking skills in most effectively cooperating to best parent their children in a two household situation.
We offer an innovative model in which one therapist works with one partner while a second therapist works with the second partner. The therapists consult with each other after each meeting (with your consent) to guide therapy toward coordinated goals for each individual person and the relationship. Couples therapy is then provided with both therapists when the couple is ready. This assists each individual partner in growing in ways that improve the relationship and speeds up progress.
We offer an innovative model in which one therapist works with an adolescent who is having difficulties and the other therapist works with the parent (or parents) in how to manage their relationship with the adolescent. With parental consent, the parental therapist will share with the therapist working with the adolescent majors aims to assist with the counseling of the adolescent.